So in ep 3 you got to know about my love life.
Yes I cried I got stuck between what I felt and what I knew. There were things my heart wasn't ready to accept even when my mind had already understood them. But life doesn't stop just because something inside you does. I went to college got busy with little things met people and slowly the days stopped revolving around what had happened.
I didn't forget him. I think I just stopped making him the centre of everything I felt.
And yes I made bad duas for him. I was hurt and at that time I thought perhaps he deserved to feel the kind of pain he had left me with. He stayed but he cheated. And I couldn't understand how someone could remain beside you while doing something that could change the way you saw them forever.
But lately I've been thinking about forgiveness.
Not the kind where you convince yourself that nothing happened. Not the kind where you suddenly see the person differently or find excuses for their choices. I mean the kind where you finally stop arguing with the past.
Because what happened has happened. No amount of anger can make it unhappen. No amount of wishing him pain can return the person I was before I knew what I know now.
And maybe that's something I've had to learn there is a difference between wanting someone to understand your pain and needing them to suffer for it.
For a while I thought letting go meant accepting defeat. As if forgiving him would somehow make what he did less wrong, or make my pain less valid. But why should my ability to find peace depend on whether he ever understands what he did?
He may never see things the way I do. He may never understand what his choices cost me. And perhaps I'll never receive the explanation that would make everything make sense.
I'm beginning to realise that I don't need to spend the rest of my life waiting for understanding from the very person whose actions left me confused.
I can leave some questions unanswered. I can accept that someone I cared for was… Read in full →
1 · 82 · The Second PoetryArt is good, but have you seen her?
Someway, somehow I gotta pin em both to the wall😂
Mother, take a look at me.
Now I stand tall, high, and proud,
holding myself together at my best.
The rest, I tell myself, doesn't matter much.
I now receive the applause,
the appreciation,
everything you ever dreamed of.
But, Mother,
why do my eyes well up
the moment I hear your voice?
Why does every congratulations
somehow turn into,
“Dont cry, beta”?
Why ,after everything
I ve achieved
does a part of me still feel like
I ve come so far
only to feel so small in front of you?
Why does every win feel a little more lost
to you, to myself?
I have everything I once wished for
so why does none of it feel enough??
Every win has lost all its meaning, mother.
👍1
2 · 117 · People often tell don't you feel ashamed of the things you write the things I’ve said or the parts of myself that life has failed to break.
But I think they misunderstand something.
I don’t write because I have nothing to hide. I write because I’m learning not to be ashamed of the parts of me that aren’t perfect. The words I regret the thoughts I struggle to explain the flaws I haven’t outgrown, and the versions of myself I’m still trying to understand.
But don’t mistake my honesty for complete transparency.
You know the versions of me I allow you to know. You read the words I choose to share. You see the imperfections I’m willing to admit not every contradiction I carry not every truth I keep to myself and not every version of me that exists beyond these words.
I am not the sum of everything I reveal, nor am I defined by everything I conceal.
I am imperfect in ways you may recognize and in ways you may never understand. And I don’t owe the world a complete explanation of who I am just to prove that I accept myself.
Perhaps self acceptance isn’t about exposing every flaw or confessing every truth. Perhaps it’s about knowing that even the parts of ourselves we struggle to accept still belong to us.
You may know my words my wounds my thoughts, and my mistakes. But you will never know every version of me and that doesn’t make any of those versions less real.
#elara
2 · 58 · I’ll be putting this here for a while. I strongly encourage you all to take full advantage of the opportunity and thank me later!
https://t.me/+IXmcHAPcgJJmZmMx
Deleting soon!
Someone said..
"Be careful with how much you tolerate, you are teaching them how to treat you."
I felt that ❤️🩹
6 · 353 · I’ll be putting this here for a while. I strongly encourage you all to take full advantage of the opportunity and thank me later!
https://t.me/+IXmcHAPcgJJmZmMx
Deleting soon!
From
Being a Stranger
to Being the person I share all my secrets with.
You were always there for me.
From
Irritating and teasing me, to Making me laugh uncontrollably You always stood beside me.
From,
Calling me by my name
To Giving me cute nicknames
I got a special person in my Life.
From,
Saying "Can we?"
to Saying "Thanks for listening"
to I got my 2am Friend
2 · 53 · find a person
who looks at u
like u're their favourite
little chaos monster
and loving you
is their favourite decision.
6 · 432 · Link
click to show
click to show
I just published "The Black Grasses (chapter 1-10)" of my story "The Black Grasses ". https://www.wattpad.com/1665574198?utm_source=android&utm_medium=whatsapp&utm_content=share_published&wp_page=create_on_publish&wp_uname=RavennaLuneth